Had a long day today.. in terms of hrs.. not realy.. but mentally i was having it real bad... today was the presentation of bm315, our project was on Potential ports on PSA. 30 min of presentation and 1hr plus of Q&A aka shooting aka Livefiring...
i was suppose to present the intro and beginning of Port of South Louisiana for our grp.. 47 slides.. 6 pple.. 30 min..and 1 idiot/coward backed out. and that was me.. i was freaking out.. in one way or another.. i dint want to present.but i knew i had to.. it wasnt a must.. but it was sort of a responsibility.. as part of the grp and having not presented b4. in the end .. shan.. the nicest person in the world presented my part on my behalf.. wats wrong with me? despite how sorry i felt abt the decision i made.. i was stuggling internal at wat i should be doing.. presenting my part. i am an irreponsible person.
i tried helping out in the QNA.which was still ok. only to know that Ian(the tut) wasnt v happy with out map( something i did) and slides structure..(another thing i did) in additional.. the guilt and tiring day left me a headache that lasted thru dinner until 11pm.. i believe in bad karma.. that was goes around comes around.. guess thats one example of that. though Ian felt we did ok on the overall.. if i coulf turn back the time.. i would present.. (so much for attempting to escape a presentation and succeeding) i would feel much better...


are u prepared?? for the big world out there?
I AM NOT.. i dun noe wat to do... met a hall mate on the sch shuttle bus on my way back hall.. he told me abt his application with P&G.. have gone thru quite a few rounds of interview.. and he is still looking forward to gd news.. and he is from engineering.. going to do CMK- consumer market knowledge

as i look at the webby www.intersg.com i wonder to myself.. where am i going to do that great leap of fate into the corporate world.. i remember the feeling of my PA. i wasnt the most well-liked person in the world.. mainly becos i was different.. and my effort to blend in din work and i gave up... thinking of taking an internship from may to july..looking at the Sale n marketing intership in Singapore Media Press and as a marketing intern in 1 Workshop Pte Ltd.. then i though.. i am prob not good enough.. i will never prob be good enough.. though a marketing major in ntu biz. i dun think the corporate world will be nice to me..wat should i do? perhaps i should be more reckless.. i realised i apply more jobs when i pms..and significantly become more ham ji (coward) when i am normal.. this is not working.. at all..