heard the above quote from the radio..i think it is really true, for sometimes the real enemy we are all facing is the everyone we see every day- ourselves. it takes great courage to make yourself face yourself...sometimes i think i just bluff or lie to myself too much..until the end...i do not who the real me is..the one trying to convince myself what is going on? or the one listening with a mocking attitude. do u ever face this problem?
sometimes i will tell myself.....zihui, u can do it if u put your mind to it..the other voice will be saying yahyah easier said than done,u try doing it lah...two voice in the head both arguing, but seldom do they come to a conclusion, also making an excuse in the end to waste time and not doing anything in the end...

talked to jia dai on the way home..it set me thinking wat i want to do after As..hehe thinking of it..i am filled with excitiment..really can't wait.
me want to get a job, any job really, as long as i can do it and the pay is reasonable..cos i am doing it for the experience..although for the $ also..i think that prob will work itself up..
me have always been quite lost about wat i want to do in the future..not that there is many choices for me to choose from...me not good at talking..studies not excellent...but wat i always want to do is to serve pple..hehe suddenly remember...yoz brother..if u are reading this, do u remember when we were young, we used to play a game called 'master and servant'?..hehe..that was so long ago..and i actually enjoyed being 'bossed' around by u...not that u were ery bossy..u were quite nice actually..and make me clean up my desk..anyway..i think i like to serve pple.. brighten up pple's life with a personalised service. wouldnt mind being a waiteress..help serve plates or something..quite nice wat.. mom said that it would work for me cos i dun even help our at home..which is not entirely true...i dun mind being a small worker actually...but then..i hope to do something for pple..and earn some allowance in the process of course...some of my friends are really into teaching..i think that is a very wei da (honourable) profession..to be able to pass on knowledge to the young ones..give them a stable foundation..who would imagine wat would haven happen to me how if my pri school teacher didnt make me understand 1+1=2.... I would have so many difficulties now..all teachers contribut to who we are today and what we learn , whether they teach relief or not...if u are a good teacher..they will remember u for a long time..if u are a bad one..they will speak bad of u for a longer time..thats why i dun want to be a teacher..anyway..i may just say some morbid stuff and get sacked....cannot lah..canot be teacher..maybe be gothic teacher..show them wat is morbid...haha

haha me was so excited by the idea of doing part time that i went to search out the nus and ntu guide books on wat course they offer..unfortunatly..i didnot find wat i have in mind...wanted to be a PR..service sector one..only found that ntu had one in the school of business-human resource..dun noe wat is that..then i went to find the recruit section of Straits times..thinking of asking Dr R on wat courses i should take...felt a bit crazy...but took down the email anyway..maybe i will pick up courage one day and mail him...maybe then i will noe the answers to my queries..for i really dun noe wat is going on in the U ..if dun noe which course to choose.. then how to aim for one...?